hELP FROM THE HEART

Help from the ♥
You see someone drowning in deadlines, frantically searching for documents, running from pillar to post, snowed under or just looking overwhelmed so you offer to help. A colleague approaches you, sometimes in desperation, asking for assistance in order to get a job done that they are struggling with for one or other reason so you say “yes”.

STOP and examine your motives … Are you genuinely being helpful, genuinely trying to ease their burden, genuinely helping them keep their head above water or do you have an ulterior motive?

At some time during our working lives we have or will be in a position where we rely on others for help. Actually, if we’re brutally honest we could not function efficiently without assistance from others be it advice, physical input, guidance, moral support, a shoulder to cry on, someone to lean on etc. Even asking a colleague to answer your telephone while you duck to the kitchen or to give you the contact number for their caterer is asking for help. It is virtually impossible to operate in isolation.

So you step up because that’s what you do. You go the extra mile, put in an extra hour or two, put your own “not urgent” work on hold, extend your hand and help. Incredibly noble and no doubt sincerely appreciated by the one being helped. STOP and examine your motives.

If you are “helping” and then blabbing at the water cooler about how much you do to help, blow your own trumpet at every opportunity, tell others how useless the individual is because they can never meet a deadline or making sure the boss knows you are the one responsible for achieving the goal, then you are not helping at all. STOP and examine your motive. Do you know if the individual is struggling with an illness, has personal problems at home, is preoccupied with a life changing event (birth of a baby, immigration of a loved one, wedding, funeral, financial problems etc.)?

Be honest in your intention, be kind in your action, be gracious in your giving and be grateful that you have the opportunity to reach out and help.

Of course you need to tread carefully around the colleague that is habitually late and lazy and needs assistance because they don’t give 100%. They are abusing you and this is unacceptable. Fortunately, they are usually the minority and this is a totally different topic. However, you still need to be kind and in this instance the kindest thing you can do is walk away and still keep your mouth shut.
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 “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be Kind. Always” (Wendy Mass)